I’ve always been one to err on the side of caution. I’m a just-in-case, kinda gal. So it seems only natural that during a pregnancy I struggled four years, endured countless needles, exams and spent tens of thousands of dollars (that we don’t have) to achieve, that I would fall into the “you-can-never-be-too-careful” category once finally in the family way. However, I think my OB thinks I’m ridiculous. And it’s not settling well with me at all.
I had an appointment yesterday, which in retrospect seemed like, Well - A big fat waste of my time. My OB was 45 minutes late getting in to see us, and when he did finally sit down with me he made me feel like a complete moron. He wasn’t mean about my questions, just over explained (complete with family anecdotes, I should mention) about why it’s fine for me at 17w2d to sleep on my back. And have three day old homemade leftover enchiladas. I half expected him to show me a flashcard with a picture of a wheel of imported Brie with a circle and a line through it. I guess I should be happy that he took his time answering all my questions, but that’s probably why he was forty-fucking-five minutes late to a 10am appointment when they open at 9am. I would expect the afternoon appointments to run a bit behind, but don’t overbook your patients then waste my and the next patients time because you’re busy rambling on to me about how your daughter won’t even consider leftovers while your wife eats three day old salads regardless of the wilted lettuce. This is only my second appointment seeing my OB, every other time I’ve seen the head Nurse Practitioner, whom I love – but obviously won’t be delivering me.
Important note: He runs a solo practice, and assured me that he won’t be going anywhere for Christmas this year. Which really appealed to me. He seems great on paper - agrees with my request for minimal intervention during labor, has a low forceps and c-section rate, and seems to have an educated staff, all of whom work well together.
So maybe I’ve been in ‘the system” too long. Maybe I’ve just gotten too used to the formality seen in the Fertility Clinic industry. And all that comes with being closely monitored. I suppose that was because I was more of a client than a patient, since we were paying everything out of pocket, not just going where an insurance administrator told us was the closest proximity to our home address. But I want that environment back! I want a doctor who is meticulously on time, and asks relevant questions, whilst dispensing useful information. I’m not asking to be coddled, hell the first word I would use to describe Dr. 3 (after awesome, that is) would be: Cyborg. Fantastic. Efficient. Warm and fuzzy, he was NOT. My OB seems more like a cross between a Surfer and an amateur standup comedian. Also, he has white hair and glasses with bifocals that he looks down over when speaking to me, and it makes me think of Benjamin Franklin. But I got there, they took my vitals, the doctor made sure both me and the baby were still alive, then left.
Am I asking too much?
After speaking to a mom, apparently aside from the personality flaws, the monthly appointments are pretty routine. Not a whole lot of action. Which honestly, is what I should want. Not a lot of fuss, or probing. Just the basics, like everyone else.
I guess I’m just getting used to what being on “the otherside” is really like. And it’s still nothing like I thought.
