My Body, My Boobies

So yeah, I'll be the first to admit it; post pregnancy - my body is NOT a wonderland. It's more like something Tim Burton created. 


But it's okay. 

My stomach is flattening out slowly, I only look about four and a half months pregnant. I'm still not entirely sure how much weight I gained because I switched doctors half way through my pregnancy. Plus my doctor's office always had a completely different number than my scale at home. Probably because A. their scale is in proper working order. and B. I usually weigh myself naked at home. First thing in the morning. Before I've eaten anything. But I'm thinking it's between 35-40 pounds total. Based on their numbers I've lost about 15 pounds since delivery. I kind of thought it would have been more, but whatever. I most certainly plan to get back to my pre-baby weight, but I'm going to allow myself the first six weeks to continue focusing on how not to be an unfit mother... 

I ended up with a minor first degree tear after delivery. My midwife doesn't grade tears by the number of stitches, but by the severity of tissue separation. She said mine wasn't bad at all. (Do your Kegels, ladies!!!) But things are tender. They have me doing a Sitz-Bath and using a squeezey bottle of warm water to rinse each time I use the bathroom. Both help take the edge off the discomfort. As do the 600mg Motrin. 

My boobies. Oi. Breast feeding is going well, now... The first few days were rough, as Leah and I were both learning how to do everything. She had a narrow palate, and we were both learning how to latch on correctly so I developed blisters on my nipples right away. That was super. But things got much easier once my milk came in. I think it helped that she didn't have to work as hard to get something out. 


There's a lot I'd like to share about breast feeding but since my time is limited, I'm going to throw it out there in bullet points. So for those of you planning to breast feed I hope this might be helpful. 

Commence Unsolicited Breast Feeding Advice:

• Even under the best circumstances, breast feeding is difficult for new mothers. And your nipples are going to be sore. Period. Because it's more than likely that you've never had someone attached to them 8-12 times a day before now.
• Buy Lanolin. Have it with you in your hospital bag, and in your diaper bag.
• Take a Breast Feeding Workshop if you can. My hospital had classes for them, it cost me $45 dollars but it was WELL worth it. If you can't take a class, I recommend picking up The Womanly Art of Breast Feeding or meeting with a Licensed Lactation Consultant. It will be worth every penny, I promise. 
• List of things to have before the baby comes: Lanolin, Nursing Pads, Softcup Breast Shells, Nursing Bra's, Nursing Tank Tops, My Brest Friend feeding pillow.  I bought the MBF and was given a hand-me-down Boppy that had barely been used, hands down the Brest Friend is worth the extra dollah billz. 
• Don't worry if your milk doesn't come in right away. I had been leaking milk and colostrum since about 28 weeks and mine still didn't come in until FIVE days postpartum. But boy did it come in quick after that.  I literally went to bed feeling like myself, then woke up looking like a Tara Reid wannabe. My boobs were ROCK. HARD. and super lumpy from all of the swollen ducts. I was in tears it was so painful. Brian sent Teresa (my bff) to go pick me up a Breast Pump, I wasn't planning to get one for a while, but good gawd, was it a life saver. I only used it to withdraw enough to be comfortable, and I haven't had to use it since.
• Shoulders Down! Be sure to relax your body when feeding. Also make sure there is a pillow under the arm of the side you're feeding on.
• Don't give up. I promise it will go from feeling like razor blades on your nipples to a gentle tugging. It's definitely not an easy thing to master but the benefits for both you and baby are monumental. 

I have to say in some ways, it's nice to sort of have my body back. To be able to bend at the waist, sleep on my back, to not have to pee every 43 seconds, and not have a consistent back ache. But that stuff aside, I actually miss being pregnant. A lot. I miss my belly and having her with me all the time. Feeling kicks, and movement. It was so wonderful. Not that it trumps having her in my arms, but I really, REALLY enjoyed my pregnancy, and I think of it often. 


I want to take a second to thank all of you for your love and support throughout my journey to get pregnant, and finally coming home with an actual baby... I cannot imagine where my life would be without having known you and the advocacy of the IF community. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you...