Alright. No more whining. It's time to get myself ready for this cycle. In preparation Brian and I spent the entire weekend doing a whole lot of nothing - in each others arms. We had a fantastic time being super lazy, it was just what I needed. Brian has been so amazing, I can't imagine waging this battle with anyone else. Part of the reason I had to stay so mellow was because I hurt my back. I had issues with it about two years ago, and it's been really sensitive every since. It tends to cramp up a lot whenever I am stressed or upset. I hadn't had flare up in a long time, but my big fat failure managed to do the trick. Awesome.
I also made the decision to start acupuncture again. I am going to see a different doctor than last time though. I found three practices within a mile of my office that specialize in reproductive care. I called today and got an appointment for tomorrow morning. They really prefer to start earlier in the cycle, but evidently any treatment is better than nothing at all. I did acupuncture for about three months months in 2008. WAY before our MFI diagnosis. I thought that the issues HAD to be on my side. I figured my CM was hostile or that I had a hormonal imbalance. My acupuncturist actually told me that other than my circulation being a little less than perfect, but my chi was okay, and that we should have an SA done. And I was like: Nah I think we'll wait on that, I am the problem.
Making this appointment reminded me of how much pressure I put on myself back then. And having one failed IUI has brought all of that back. Now I wonder how much of my stress may actually be part of the problem. Hopefully the acupuncture will help with all of that.
OMFG.
DID I REALLY JUST SUGGEST THAT RELAXING WILL MAKE ME GET PREGNANT?????!!!!
Jesus. I AM losing it.
13 comments:
:)
Hoping that the acupuncture helps to calm your anxieties, but also helps your back too.
Hahaha..."maybe if you just relax or take a vacation..." :)
I'm glad you're hanging in there. I've been thinking about you. And yay for a new cycle beginning. Acupuncture sounds like a good idea- couldn't hurt, might very well help. I will be on the sidelines cheering for you this cycle!!!
I hope that the acupuncture helps - whatever it can!
Has your DH considered trying acupuncture too? We were diagnosed with MFI too and my husband tried acupuncture for 3 months. His morphology went from 0% normal to 17% normal in that time frame. we haven't had it checked since, but it could be even better now. I highly suggest giving it a try if your insurance will cover it. Good luck!
I am so glad you have Brian. An amazing DH makes a world of difference. Has you back gotten any better?
I hope the acupuncture really helps... I also did it during the IVF to (gulp- can't believe I am saying this) to help me relax and minimize stress to maximize our chance of success. Oh well- we swallow our pride to do whatever we can that might, maybe, possibly help it work, don't we?
So happy you and Brain had a great weekend of relaxation, sometimes that's all we need to recharge. That's so great about starting acupunture again, I really hope it helps you. Feel better soon and can't wait to hear about the start of this new cycle!!
Melissa - I really think you just need to relax. You will get pregnant immediately if you just stop worrying about it so much and have "fun" with it.... JUST KIDDING!!!! That would be the most terrible advice I'd ever given! ;)
I'm sure that it's hard not to be hard on yourself right now (I know I would've automatically jumped to that too) however, setting those fears aside and knowing that there was a 16% chance of it working tells you that even the most healthy woman with nothing wrong with her could still not conceive on the first try but your additional tries/try could be very successful. It's so hard to keep the hope though after disappointment has been part of your life for so long. I'm so glad your doing acupuncture - if anything for yourself. I really hope it helps all around. Your back sounds very painful and what a crappy time for it to act up again. I hope you feel better very soon!
M - thank you so much for your support! I will go back and read what you wrote when I am on the edge!!!
Yeah why dont you just relax then you'll get pregnant... how many times do we get to hear that down this IF road??? But funny how we can convince ourselves of it too!!
I'll be thinking of you AND you have an award on my blog! :)
~Michelle
Melissa - thank you so much for your comment... It really boosted my spirits! Now, how much can I pay you to keep it coming? ;) I'm sorry things can get so stressful. I'm planning on going back to acupuncture as well, crossing my fingers maybe that will help both with the stress and with the whole getting pregnant thing. Yes, I know I said it too -- relaxing may not get you pregnant, but it will get you RELAXED!
Hang in there!
Thank you for visiting my blog - I'm glad to find someone else who's doing a dIUI - plus the acupuncture connection!
I must confess something though - even though I am Canadian, I'm not a big hockey fan (the entire country just gasped I'm sure!) - so I can totally deal with your affection for San Jose!
Will be interested to hear how the return to acupuncture goes - please keep in touch!
Melissa- I am late reading this, but I think it is freaking hilarious that you gave yourself some Aunt Jane advice!!!
Love you!
Post a Comment