Eventually

Thank you all for your comments on my last post. We did end up making it to our friends house, and we did give them the Sharks stuff. I wish I could say it was because I found a new source of inner strength, but the truth is I really hated the idea of putting it off any longer. I'd been dreading this visit for months now, and the thought of it looming over my head for even longer seemed a worse consequence than suffering for a single hour. It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be but it still sucked ass. Seeing the baby wasn't too bad (I remembered I actually like babies) it was watching the blissful grandparents and great grandparents shine over the newest family member. Just the thought of our grandparents not being around to meet our child(ren) breaks my heart. And in a way I feel like we've failed them. Seeing my friend (the daddy) all oowey gooey over his daughter was rough too. I don't blame him though, I'm sure Brian will be the same way. (SOMEDAY) It's just hard because this should have been us- two years ago.

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We still haven't made any progress with making a decision about our next step. My opinion changes on a daily and sometimes hourly basis, but I'm doing my best not to burden Brian with each of my newest conclusions. God knows he's put up with enough of my crazy already.

The only good news is that I don't feel pressured by time or the pure ache to be cycling/doing SOMETHING. I am somewhat content with taking as much time as we need to figure out what is the best option. Which helps me find peace when I start to get too deep in to contemplation.

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Several weeks ago I was reading a post by S at Misconceptions about Conception, when she wrote about a necklace she had purchased from Et.sy. When I saw it I immediately fell in love with idea of what it represented. And at the time was in dire need for a little retail therapy...

I love this necklace. And I wear it often. I feel like everyone still in the battle should have one to wear proudly. To rub between their fingers when they walk past a pregnant woman, or visit new parents in the hospital, or dodge the "when are you having kids?" conversation.

I wish I could give one to all of you. But can't. I can only give out one. When I made this purchase before my last failed cycle I decided that I would buy two. I thought that if I finally got my BFP that month I could share this with you to say: "See? It will happen, Eventually". And if I didn't get my BFP, I knew I could still hold my head up knowing that so many of you have dealt with failures, and that you can still say: "It will happen, Eventually".

I did not get any sponsorship for this. It's just something I really want to do. I tried to come up with some really creative ways to pick a winner, but the truth is I'm just not that creative. So I'm going to do a good old fashioned drawing.

To enter, please email me with your Name and Blog address at bloggyme027 at gmail dot com. If you are the winner I will contact you via email before I post anything here, to make sure that you're okay with me posting about you. My only request is that participants are ones who are still battling IF. Please make sure your entries are in by February 15th. I will pick a winner and post about it shortly thereafter.

Good luck!