Maintaining My Hatred of Progesterone

I can appreciate the fundamental necessity of Progesterone, but in my life even before ART, it has proven to be a thorn in my side. My breasts are typically sore from the time I ovulate, to a few days after my period starts. Which is just over two weeks at a time. So now that I am post transfer, Standard Operating Procedure is to supplement the bodies own production with messy vaginal suppositories and painful intramuscular injections that require a 25 gauge inch and a half long needle in which to deliver the goods. I'm on day six of said injections and I already find myself wincing as pull my jeans over my backside. And after the shot on the day of the transfer I took the bed rest order a little too seriously and chose not to walk around after the injection. The burning sensation in my left asscheek had me tossing and turning until after 1am.  And last night within ten minutes of starting those bastard little suppositories, I had noticeable cramping.

I use a heating pad before and after the shot.
I've warmed the part of the needle with the progesterone in it, to thin the oil
I walk around after
Is it still normal to be SO sore???
The shot itself doesn't hurt - it's the next day that I feel it.

Oh and my girls are already sore.

That said, here's to eight more weeks of it! 


I'm feeling much better in general. Though I continued to feel bloated and tired from the OHSS, the Gatorade liquid restriction made a huge difference. And after the retrieval I felt exceptionally better with each passing day. The only thing I've noticed is that my belly is still a little distended, anyone else have that? 

Oh, one bit of good news. We have one little guy that made it to freeze on Day Six. A Grade II Blastocyst. I had really prepared myself for the possibility of not having any at all, so to say I'm relieved would be an understatement. I promise I'll get my transfer day pictures up soon - we've gotten a new printer and I haven't managed to figure out the scanning function yet. With all the amazing advances in technology I must say there is still no love for the printer...

Aspiration Cancelled

Cause the bitch is GONE.

I thought long and hard about how to write this post in a way that would melodiously lay out the details of the entire ordeal without revealing the conclusion until the very end. But when have I ever been that tactful?

So yes, the cyst is gone. HOT. DOG.

We rushed to our 1pm appointment yesterday (we got bumped) because despite the fact that I had reminded everyone and their mother that yesterday was daylight savings, I neglected to heed my own caution and forgot to set my clocks forward. And being the torrid pile of lethargy that I am, had only gotten out of the shower about ten minutes before we were actually supposed to leave. (12: 30pm) The reason that's a big deal is because it takes a beastly load of effort and dedication for me to not look like a slovenly hobo before I leave the house.

So we get there on time, only to sit in the waiting room for twenty minutes while some jackass ignores is obnoxiously loud seven year old son, who is jumping up and down in place trying to hit the top of the 6 foot high magazine rack. And as much as I wanted to poke both him and his father in the eye, if the dad had left the room for just half a second I would stuffed my sock in that kids mouth to muffle his screams while I grabbed him and took him home to be our new son. A nurse I had never seen before walked in to the waiting room and called my name. She took us back to a room that had already been prepped for my impending detonation. It was fairly terrifying to see all of the paraphernalia laid out. I don't know even know what half of the instruments were, but it made me think of a scene from Fire In The Sky where Travis Walton was... Anyway. It was scary though, believe me. 

Dr. 3 entered the room just briefly after I threw a tantrum because Brian couldn't think of anything to talk about while we waited, (Yay for Lupron doing enough to make me a raving bitch!) He shook both of our hands and didn't waste a second before grabbing the wand to "have a look at things first". 

Left side = Good. 
Lining = Good. (still at 4mm)
Femoral Artery = Working. (YEAH, I'VE SEEN IT BEFORE, MOVE ON.) 
Right side with cyst = ..... No cyst located. Ovary quiet. Antra follicle count = As expected. 

Yippe kai yay, mutha f-.

Dr. 3 said everything looked great and pending another E2 check, I'd be able to start stims asap.




Soooooooooo, I just got the call back from my nurse and my E2 was 26!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I START STIMS TOMORROW!!!

Inconsistency

Thank you all for the birthday wishes, my weekend was better than I could have hoped for. We went to dinner Friday night, did a movie marathon Saturday during the day, then finished up by using my spa gift cards (from Christmas) to get both of us massages! Which were fantastic save one thing. My girls. O-M-F-G do my boobs hurt. Laying on my stomach while the masseuse was doing my back was borderline agony. I almost asked her to stop. I've grown accustomed to the typical cast of characters as far as my PMS goes, but it's been all over the place since dealing with meds. Namely the progesterone. Sore boobs have always been a significant symptom, they'd start getting sore the day after I ovulated, and continue that way until I got my period. But once I started the progesterone the soreness was gone... HALLELUJAH!!! I sort of welcomed all the other crappy side effects from the Prometrium because I had been spared from the two weeks of barely being able to sleep on my stomach because my girls hurt so bad... Actually the worst part was taking off my bra at the end of the day.

But now my last two cycles have been fairly strange. The first period I had after my last BFN was nine days early. And I'm fairly certain I didn't ovulate, I'm one of the freaks who can feel it, and I never had any EWCM. And I'm pretty sure I didn't ovulate in February either because again both main indicators were MIA. As was my period, which this time was nine days late. And all the while, my girls stayed silent. Until I got my period, she showed up the day after I finally gave in and tested. (No miracle BFP for us, no way, no how!) So since the day my tardy period showed up my girls have been sore. I finally ovulated on Wednesday last week and from that day on they've gotten even MORE sore - GAH! At one point Brian got so tired of hearing me complain that he barked out: "Jesus, you should go get them checked out!" As if they're sprained ankles or something... I was about to sarcastically thank him for his compassion when he quipped that it would probably suck a lot if his boys were sore for weeks at a time. Indeed, Sir.

Anyone else have anything like that? - Odd cycles and strong PMS symptoms after stopping medicated cycles?

Anyway, where was I ? Right - the weekend. So yes, I had a lovely birthday although I insisted that Brian not call it my "birthday weekend" and just call it my "me-time". I didn't really want to acknowledge it much. Thirty one - oy vey. It's not that I feel old or anything, it's just absorbing the fact that I'm not twenty-two anymore. Which in a way - thank gawd for that. But you know what I mean... Back to my "me-time" I think hands down the best part of my weekend was having Brian all to myself. He's been pretty busy with his company as of late, so it was quite the treat to steal him away. Thanks for spoiling me dear.

Can't Fight These Feelings

I've had a few inquiries as to how I'm feeling, and whether or not I'm getting any pregnancy related symptoms. The answer unfortunately, is no. I am however feeling a BUTTLOAD of side effects from the Promet.rium. I wasn't originally going to look them up because I was afraid it would only fuel the fire of obsessive speculation, but I had to check it out today because I've been experiencing some weird shit.

Oh, let's start with my favorite:

• Oral and Vaginal dryness - There's likely no need for me to elaborate on this one. It's about as awesome as it sounds.
• Acne - My skin is not exactly fantastic to begin with, so the new monster zits that have showed up on my neck and boobs are just icing on the pockmarked cake.
• Anxiety and insomnia - For a second I though I was loosing my mind. The last 5 or six nights I have slept like absolute shit. I'm totally restless and keeping having ridiculous dreams where I'm worried about things like whether or not Madison from Mill.ion Doll.ar Lis.ting made the right decision in lowering the price of the Malibu house by 600k. Absurd, just absurd.
• Frequent Urination - It's probably because I'm drinking tons water in a futile attempt to quench my severe cotton mouth, but cheeseandcrackers folks! I have to pee ALL THE LIVE LONG DAY. And night too! But that doesn't really bother me because it's not like I'm busy sleeping at 2:36am ANY DAMN WAY.
• Heartburn - After Every. Single. Meal. Without Fail.

So there it is. That's everything I'm feeling. Oh and 'the girls' are still quiet. Not the slightest bit of soreness. Which is still fine with me. Sigh. I have no better idea of whether or not it worked this time, than I have the last three times. But there's still hope. At least I have that.

I'm 13dpo.

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Oops I forgot to mention whether I was going to test or not. How about Saturday morning? Yikes.